nobody expects the spanish inquisition script

Stop there - stop there. Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition; Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition. Ximinez: Confess! [Zoom into Fang's horrified face] THIS WAS THE SPANISH INQUISITION . [Biggles pushes in a comfy chair -- a really plush one] Ximinez: Ha! [The Inquisition exits] Chapman: I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition. Voice Over: 'IN THE EARLY YEARS OF THE SIXTEENTH CENTURY, TO COMBAT THE RISING TIDE OF RELIGIOUS UNORTHODOXY, THE POPE GAVE CARDINAL XIMINEZ OF SPAIN LEAVE TO MOVE WITHOUT LET OR HINDRANCE THROUGHOUT THE LAND, IN A REIGN OF VIOLENCE, TERROR … I'll come in again. [Biggles holds out two ordinary modern household cushions]

Um, I'll come in again...” ― Monty Python Read more quotes from Graham Chapman. Biggles: I.... Ximinez: Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition! 'My old man said follow the--' ... our chief weapons are surprise...blah blah blah.

Cleveland: Pardon?

Il backup è quella cosa che andava fatta prima. [JARRING CHORD] Put her in the Comfy Chair! Ximinez: Okay, stop. Phew! Cardinal Fang!

37,890. Ximinez: Now, old lady -- you have one last chance. Ximinez: Expects... Ximinez:Right! I suppose we make it worse by shouting a lot, do we? Ha! Cardinal Biggles [Jones] has goggles pushed over his forehead.

Cleveland: Oh no - what kind of trouble?

Clevelnd: We're innocent. Amongst our weaponry are such diverse elements as: fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope, and nice red uniforms - Oh damn! Confess! Ximinez: Inquisition. Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition. Ximinez: So you think you are strong because you can survive the soft cushions.

Wilde: I don't understand what I'm accused of. [Biggles turns an imaginary handle on the side of the dish-rack] Cleveland: I don't understand what you're saying. Chapman: I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition. Virus scan. Ximinez: Fear, surprise, and a most ruthless-- [controls himself with a supreme effort] Ooooh! Biggles: Er.... Nobody...um....

©1995-1998 [DIABOLICAL LAUGHTER] Fetch...THE CUSHIONS! Ximinez: Not you! ], Voice Over: 'IN THE EARLY YEARS OF THE SIXTEENTH CENTURY, TO COMBAT THE RISING TIDE OF RELIGIOUS UNORTHODOXY, THE POPE GAVE CARDINAL XIMINEZ OF SPAIN LEAVE TO MOVE WITHOUT LET OR HINDRANCE THROUGHOUT THE LAND, IN A REIGN OF VIOLENCE, TERROR AND TORTURE THAT MAKES A SMASHING FILM. Cardinal Fang [Gilliam] is just Cardinal Fang] Ximinez: NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! [Cut to film: moving over Brengel drawing of tortures; epic film music. Chapman: *I* don't know - Mr Wentworth just told me to come in here and say that there was trouble at the mill, that's all - I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition. “No one expects the Spanish Inquisition! Ximinez: Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition! Confess! Poke her with the soft cushions! He hums heavily to cover his anger]

[Biggles carries out this rather pathetic torture] Ximinez: NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Ximinez: [gritting his teeth] I *know*, I know you can't. Chapman: *I* don't know - Mr Wentworth just told me to come in here and say that there was trouble at the mill, that's all - I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition.

Tags for this mod. Nobody expects the spanish inquisition. [Biggles produces a plastic-coated dish-drying rack. Ha! 211. Well, we shall see. Confess In fact, those who do expect - Do you confess? Stop. Confess! Ximinez: You'll have to say the bit about 'Our chief weapons are ...' Right! (she hands over the photo and the young lady tears it up) And this is the Spanish Inquisition hiding behind the coal shed. Unique DLs -- Total DLs-- Total views. Ximinez: Surprise... An ancient italian proverb says.

Chapman: One on't cross beams gone owt askew on treadle. Ximinez: NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition!

I didn't want to say anything. The Broken Plank.

[Ximinez bundles the cardinals outside again] Confess the heinous sin of heresy, reject the works of the ungodly -- *two* last chances. Cardinal Fang [Gilliam] is just Cardinal Fang]

The concept of backup is quite confusing. [JARRING CHORD] [aside, to Biggles] Is that really all it is? [They roughly push her into the Comfy Chair] Ximinez: Right! Last updated 24 October 2015 1:33AM. Chapman: Trouble at mill. Version. Biggles: Shall I...?

Original upload 24 October 2015 1:41AM. Endorsements. You have three last chances, the nature of which I have divulged in my previous utterance. .'. Clevelnd: Innocent. [Fang and Biggles make a pathetic attempt to tie her on to the drying rack] Chapman: One on't cross beams gone owt askew on treadle. Ximinez looks at it and clenches his teeth in an effort not to lose control. Dear Old Lady: This is Uncle Ted in front of the house. I didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition. Confess! Ximinez: You....Right! Biggles! Young Lady: Oh! Biggles: Surprise and -- Ha! Stop. (she hands over the photo and the young lady tears it up) And this is Uncle Ted even nearer the side of the house, but you can still see the front. [Cut to film: moving over Brengel drawing of tortures; epic film music.] Ximinez: Our chief weapons are... She is made of harder stuff! 1. . Biggles: We'll soon change your mind about that! (she hands over the photo and the young lady tears it up) This is Uncle Ted at the back of the house.

Biggles: That's enough. We Deny Everything [JARRING CHORD] Cardinal, give the rack [oh dear] give the rack a turn. If that's the way you want it -- Cardinal! Created by clanky4 . Then we'll make you understand! Er, among our chief weapons are: fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, and near fanatical devotion to the Pope!

All rights reserved. Confess, woman. Fetch...THE COMFY CHAIR! [JARRING CHORD] [The cardinals burst in] Ximinez: NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! [JARRING CHORD] On to next scene, or back to previous scene

[The cardinals enter] (she hands over the photo and the young lady tears it up) This is the back of the house, with Uncle Ted coming round the side to the front. Ximinez [angrily hurling away the cushions]: Hm!

Biggles: Here they are, lord. [Biggles stands their awkwardly and shrugs his shoulders] We Deny Everything

Safe to use . Ha! Ha! [To Cardinal Biggles] I can't say it - you'll have to say it.

Download: Manual; 0 of 0 File information. Biggles! Biggles: I... [The door flies open and Cardinal Ximinez of Spain [Palin] enters, flanked by two junior cardinals. How do you plead? Chapman: I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition. Uploaded by clanky4. The Broken Plank. Tie her down. Ha! Cardinal, read the charges. (Friend takes it with the first sign of real interest.) Replacer; … And you shall be free -- *three* last chances. Ximinez: I see. February 10, 2018 tutorials. Ximinez: Ha! Biggles: What? Biggles: Yes, lord. Now, Cardinal -- the rack! Cleveland: Well what on earth does that mean? Ximinez: NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition!

The Spanish Inquisition is a three-part sketch that appears in "The Spanish Inquisition," the fifteenth episode of Monty Python's Flying Circus. ©1995-1998 Biggles: Yes, lord. [JARRING CHORD] Ximinez: No, just pretend for God's sake. Share this quote: Like Quote. Wilde: I don't know what you're talking about. Ximinez: Have you got all the stuffing up one end? Ximinez [with a cruel leer]: Now -- you will stay in the Comfy Chair until lunch time, with only a cup of coffee at eleven. Biggles: I know, I know! (she hands over the photo and the young lady tears it up) And this is Uncle Ted at the side of the house. Our chief weapon is surprise, fear and surprise; two chief weapons, fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency! Ha! Chapman: [slightly irritatedly and with exaggeratedly clear accent] One of the cross beams has gone out askew on the treadle. [JARRING CHORD] Ximinez: Ha! [The Inquisition exits] Biggles: I confess! I'll come in again. Fang [terrified]: The...Comfy Chair? A rough translation could be something like this: the backup is the thing that had to be done before. I just wanted to try and ignore your crass mistake. Chapman: I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition.

Biggles: Expects... Nobody expects the...um...the Spanish...um...

Biggles: It doesn't seem to be hurting her, lord. [DIABOLICAL ACTING] Confess! Canned Script Entire Script Comfy Chairs [The door flies open and Cardinal Ximinez of Spain [Palin] enters, flanked by two junior cardinals.

Biggles: Our chief weapons are...um...er...

(she hands over the photo and the young lady tears it up) This is Uncle Ted, back again at the front of the house, but you can see the side of the house. Biggles: [rather horrified]: I couldn't do that... Monty Python’s Flying Circus, Series 2, Episode 2. Fang: You are hereby charged that you did on diverse dates commit heresy against the Holy Church.

Cardinal Biggles [Jones] has goggles pushed over his forehead. [To Cleveland] Now, how do you plead? All rights reserved. Ximinez: Now, old woman -- you are accused of heresy on three counts -- heresy by thought, heresy by word, heresy by deed, and heresy by action -- *four* counts. Ah!

[The door flies open and Ximinez, Biggles and Fang enter.] [Cut to them torturing a dear old lady, Marjorie Wilde] [The cardinals burst in] Ximinez: It makes it all seem so stupid.

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